Tuesday, 26 September 2017
I've been trying to start a fast today. Well, I still haven't had anything other than water, but at this time of the evening (just after seven) is when one normally starts to have fun ....or a drink of beer, for instance. Oh well.
I've been working on the novel for long enough recently to get back into it. I've really enjoyed working on it though it has bugger all to do with buddhism or anything. Anyway, I feel quite positive now about writing and was thinking maybe I should try to contact play agents about the Jock Tamson's play. It's just finding the time and being bothered. Since I don't need any more money, I don't think my heart is into doing anything for money. I don't care about folk wanting to read my stuff or anything like that either. I do like writing though!! Always have. I think I'll get into it and not try to give it up ever again. Maybe have a holiday now and again!
The Botanical Gardens is a delight, especially when you can't go sometimes because your friend has a dog. Today was just lovely. Sat meditating in a really nice spot as well.
Monday, 18 September 2017
What a change in the allotment in the last week or so! One of my broccoli things had flowered. Might put it in the soup anyway.
I'm very positive about my meditations and all right now. It was so good down at the Samye Ling. I don't know anything about anything, but if there are channels to open and that's a process that is indicated by changes .... well, they are pretty open now!! So now I've got to kick on and be more determined about the purification.
I'm hoping to start a fast tomorrow. I think I must have done two three days fasts before. Not quite sure. Done at least one, so I know it's a wee bit of a challenge, but easily doable. Anyway, the health benefits of fasting are pretty obvious. Shame it makes you hungry. We'll see. Should give it a go!
Friday, 15 September 2017
The top photie was taken just after I arrived. It's the lama and one other. Seeing him as soon as I got there, I found most auspicious. And it was a wonderful visit. It usual for me to feel a wee bit restless during the day at some point, but that didn't happen this time.
The meditations were fabulous sometimes, the way they developed over the four days. Lots of bliss and some heat. Of course, whenever I get back from the Samye Ling, I always feel tired. I'm not too sure why, but that's the way it is. Only got on here to get the photies transferred.
The last few times I've been down there the abbot has been absent for one reason or another, but it was brilliant meditating with him in the temple every morning. Just brilliant.
Also, much enjoyed a book called Brilliant Moon, the autobiography of Dilgo Khent...can't spell the boy's name.
Friday, 1 September 2017
Just back from a week spent in Kirk Yetholm. This is almost in England and I did not realise how lovely some of the Border countryside was. Lots of travelling folk lived in this place and in the cottage where we stayed. One of the photies is of the cottage in the long ago. Family of twelve lived here at one time. Highlights of the trip were getting onto the Holy Island (though we just drove back off since Heather had been there before, visiting the scene of the Battle of Flodden, and seeing the Smailholm Tower, which was a place to hide/love during the reiving years.
Tuesday, 22 August 2017
On Sunday, since I'd spoken to Stephen Greenhorn about it the day before, I read the copy of the play I got from the folk in the Appleton Tower, where I met him on Saturday.
I wanted to just read it in a oner, and get some kind of feeling about it, and then leave it for good. But I was too surprised by it to come to any conclusion. I'd forgotten that I'd changed the ending (again!) and the bits about the Old Man that I'd re-inserted just jumped out at me. I couldn't see the arc, the shape of the piece, unfolding the way I would have liked. The problem with writing scripts which will never be performed is that there isn't really a cut off point, the kind a performance gives you. Anyway, I'll try not to do anything to yon play unless I get some actors to read it. Which won't happen, but that's okay.
The bliss was so strong, so good today, especially in the first meditation. Hard to say now when the first meditation begins. Lying on my side or on my back in bed in the morning has lots of bliss coming into it these days. The man said you could meditate sitting, lying, and walking. I haven't got the bliss whilst walking yet, but I'm better at the inter meditational times walking or not because I try to keep in mind that everything is arising and abiding and declining as one thing, which I am very fortunate to be a little part of. Anyway, even if Dzogchen is not a gradual path, I think this idea was re-inforced by reading some of the Dzogchen stuff.
The photie is from a couple of months ago, a random look out the side window.
Saturday, 19 August 2017
I had a great meeting with Stephen Greenhorn today. Most enjoyable. We were supposed to be talking about my play, Jock Tamson's Half Hearted Transformation, but most of the time was spent catching up. Lots of good things seemed to have happened to Stephen in the last twenty years, which is what you want to hear. Seems he lived in London for eight years or so, but now he's moved into a house in Chalmers Crescent. When Graham Worrell bought a house with a roof on it in Wormit, I realised that the kind of folk who lived in middle class houses were now friends of mine. But Chalmers Crescent? So pleased. It's not always the bastards who score in this world.
Stephen seemed to like the play. Said it needed tightened up here and there and so it does. That's why I'd like to hear it read. That probably won't happen. There's no point in writing plays without getting a commission first. I don't like working from commissions and would prefer to just write something, and that is not the way it used to work, and I don't think it's any better now. Anyway, it was good to do this today.
Stephen said my play was picked not because he used to know me, but because it was one of the four best sent in. That was nice to know. But even if it was Hamlet, it's chances of getting a production from this position is zilch. C'est la vie. Pleased to have written it. That's the main thing.
Wednesday, 16 August 2017
I finished a new first chapter of the thriller the other day. Another new beginning. I thought the meeting with Stephen Greenhorn this Saturday to talk about the play was going to get called off when I got an email telling me the meeting was in Glasgow. Just a mistake.
Monday, 14 August 2017
That's a photie of Crichton Castle. And a post. My friend usually drives us into the countryside every weekend in search of such as woodland walks, with chickens if possible. Also, water. Occasionally, you get to drive past castles. They're all over the shop.
I boiled up some apples tonight. Delicious. I can't eat them raw, but just boiling them seems to change their taste completely. Since I stopped being a vegetarian (when I got back from the Singalila Ridge) I've been eating a lot of chicken and making chicken soup. The soup tonight has the chicken stock and tatties, onions and cabbage that I grew. Very nice soup.
I was a bit annoyed with myself today. I started writing the thriller. Might as well. I really quite enjoyed it too! I gave up writing to meditate six hours a day, but these days I'm lucky to do three, at least at the weekends. So I might as well write. That makes no sense, but I'll do more.
Wednesday, 9 August 2017
Was away there for ten days. The first week was spent in Denmark with the nephew Liam and his people. Then we went to Hamburg. All guys. About seven male relatives from three generations. Nobody interested in meditating except me.
Well, sometimes you've to got to think that you're just not in a place where you will be able to meditate much. In Hamburg there are lots of other things you could do there, and almost nobody is going to go there to meditate. But it was easy in Denmark. In Hamburg it was full on socialising and far too much drinking. So I spent Monday night at home and I won't be back here till tomorrow. Where is home and how do I get there?
It's time to get back to me and all the bits that keep me together. This afternoon I did my first training session for nearly two weeks. But going away and hardly meditating .... well, it seems if I don't meditate much, I feel much less happy. Whether I meditate much or not, it seems that the channels keep opening further .... like, almost despite me, so you could back into a meditation when you've been lax for a bit and it's wow! Why the hell am I not doing this?
At this moment, it's as if I gave up writing to meditate more and now I'm hardly doing either. But going on holidays with my male relatives was a great thing to do. And I think I drank less than anyone apart from Jamie, my great nephew, who wasn't legal to drink in the first place!!