More Heat!

                  The change of view mentioned in the last post changed again, as it would, and not for the best. This is due to not meditating enough and being a moron.

                   This last week has been a very bad one for relationships, but very good for the heat. So really it's been the best of times and the worst of times. Last night I had far too much to drink and today was not a good day, but it's okay now.

                   Wednesday this week was a bit of a red letter day for the juju! More heat, more feelings of openness, etc. I was really happy with this and thought of how long ago it was that I read The Bliss of Inner Fire and wanted to practise this stuff. Wednesday was just different, as if my meditations had reached a different level.

                     Had news of a couple of deaths recently and though they weren't folk I knew well, it does make you think that you are no guaranteed the time. I need to stop drinking.

                     Anyway, I'm due down at the Samye Ling for a week from next Monday and it would be good to use that as a take off point for total sobriety from here on in. Well, I've said that before, but on the other hand, I haven't had any tobacco for nearly three years so it can be done!!

                     I took the top photie in Morningside last night. My friend Kate is in one of them. I visit here every Friday I can. The photies of the art work don't do it justice. Great exhibition in the Modern Art Gallery. What was the artist called again? An Indian guy called Rajid something.

A Change of View

          Things have been going so well with my meditations recently that something of a sense of contentment and satisfaction has occasionally intruded to the extent that I began to feel a lot more relaxed about life in general.

          I'm going to suffer and die and I won't ever be able to reach what is possible, but I have come far enough to be in the area of "unlikely". All I can do is meditate as much as I can without constantly aggravating myself to be something I'm not going to be, not in this lifetime. I want to be more  content and happier and this seemed to be the way things have been going, due to movement in the meditations over the last week or so. Hard to say how pleased this made me.

         I finished the plotline stuff for the novel and now all I have to do is write it. I have about a hundred and twenty pages at the moment and will need at least double that.

        It's not half eleven in the morning yet, and it is very nice looking outside, but I will write till lunchtime. That's much keener than usual, but now I know enough about what I'm doing not to waste too much time writing stuff I'll just have to edit out later.

       Everything is going very well right now. One of the photies is of a big hoose somewhere to the south. We tend to go somewhere every Saturday. New Hailes House? The bag of onions is this year's crop.