Hut time

             I was in the hut after dark last night.. It's eight years since I bought this new hut and this is the first time I've been there at night time. This is to keep me away from the beer and increase the opportunities for more meditating.

            I felt very happy to be there as it grew dark. The fire was spectacular. I spent many, many nights in a tent down at the Samye Ling before I was sixty and after I was fifty five and that was much more awkward what with the fight with the midges and all that. 

            Let's have more of that then!!!

Apple Blossom Time.

                I've just finished putting up new free book promotions. Makes me feel connected somehow, but who knows what with? Agency, I think is the word I'm looking for. Feels as if you're doing something.

                 The last time I put up free book promotions something odd happened. Bugtown was downloaded over forty times, I think. Usually, I'm expecting each of the eleven books on Kindle to be downloaded a couple of times. So why so many? Maybe for a class of eleven year olds, I hope. I have a lot of confidence in Bugtown. After a year of trying to find an agent for it, I think I got one agent to read three chapters. But kids loved it. The Land of the Demon Masters was written just to see, but I tried to write a kidsbook with Bugtown. 

                Last week I sold two copies of The Buddha and the Big Bad Wolf.  Most surprised. It's rare to sell anything these days (well, I don't want to read them either), but that's 70p to me. Who said there was no money in books.

                I worked in the allotment today from about half two till have five. Normally, I do an hour at most, but I'm late this year. I'm starting to feel really positive these days. This is the same as feeling really negative, but with different chemicals. Better, of course.
 

This Life

        This is a very good time. My allotment is about five hundred yards away. Now that I am healed from the plague and the weather is wonderful, well, what else could you want? Beautiful weather. Had that for the last four or so days. So about ten days without the covid and after being part of this Easter Holiday life the weekend before last ... I had a rest. Next weekend, my companion is away somewhere and I have a chance relax into my self in life in Stockeree. With the way the meditations are going and all ... I don't deserve this.

        I drank some cannabutter coffee the other night. Sometimes the best thing about being stoned, or intoxicated as the ancient Greeks may have it, is that you get a view of yourself from a different perspective. 

       Sitting up doing the juju on Sunday night around midnight, after my companion fell asleep, I just felt great about everything in my life. I didn't feel frustrated about the books I didn't get the chance to write and stuff like that. I thought all  my relationships were great. My health is fine. Life being an accumulation of effort and joy.

        I'd found an FB post about City Whitelight when I'd read it whilst scanning it for Kindle circa 2011. A wee gothic classic. Then I felt fine about all the writing stuff in my life. You do what you can. Everything seemed smoothed out and better than I could have hoped. I had a forty two year old relationship with Wena and that was much better than anything I could have expected. This is a veil of sorrows, but I've been so lucky. I feel great just now and I don't have to go to work tomorrow, or ever again. I'm not skint either. I owe almost everything to the good fortune of having such a great lifelong partner. Sometimes, I can't believe my luck.

        By the way, someone in Washington D.C. is still haunting my statscounter monitor. No one else comes here, pal. It's just you and me. Meditate for fuck sake!