Not quite the normal Joe.

          Poisonous insisted that I go get shades, so I'm in the optician's and the boy says look up. So I looks up. No, no! he said. Look down. So I looks down. Look up now, he says. I looks up. No, no! he said. Look down. Now, just look over my head.

          I asked him if it was normal to be able to roll your eyes up so that your pupils disappear, and he said it wasn't really normal. When the Zombie Apocalypse kicks off, I'll fit right in.

          I went to see The Eagles with Brian Wilson on Monday in Glasgow. I sat there and closed my eyes, and probably rolled them up, so I could hear the music reverberate through the bliss. At one point everyone was standing up around me and I was sitting there with my eyes closed. And that probably didn't look all that normal. But since the ticket cost £125, I didn't care if it looked normal or not.

          My auntie Kathy went out shopping today, so I didn't go to Bellshill. I went up the allotment instead, but since the daughter and her man were there, I did quite a lot of work really. I put a carpet and lino down in the hut and we erected some kind of house for plants. I took the black plastic off the mound and it seems to have done the trick. Most of the stuff in there was dead. The sparrow chicks are still alive though. Nice to have them there.